I would say it depends on what you are trying to achieve, and at what cost you are willing to pay to achieve it.
There are those who are willing to keep things quiet and allow their spouse the time and spouse to see if they make the right choice. And if not, the lbs moves on.
And then there are those who have a need be right, even if it destroys the bridges back to the marriage.
This is a false choice, and by no means the only two options. Regardless of what one believes about some of the most passive or the most aggressive DBing (or other) strategies, I would hesitate to characterize those that are advocating them as only doing them out of "the need to be right."
