WAW having affair, still living in separate rooms

[kenva]

Has anyone here have in laws that are totally against their daughter wanting a divorce? How could that help or hurt!

[AnotherStander]

I realize you've already had this convo, but this is for future reference since I'm sure it won't be the last:

I plan on talking with her tonight. I'm going to be calm,listen to her and tell her what I think.

See above edit. Listen to her, validate her feelings. Don't reason/ beg/ plead/ negotiate/ agree/ disagree/ tell her what you think or feel. It's all about her.

I am also going to bring up the OM and tell her that it is not right for him to be around my s.

Telling her = control and manipulation. For 99% of the people here that qualifies as "more of the same" behavior and hurts the sitch. If she's acting like a rebellious teen like most WAS's do, then when you "tell her" anything, what do you think her reaction will be? Why to do the opposite of course! If you don't like OM around your S then you can ASK her if she's willing to keep them apart, but really you have no means of enforcing it even if she agrees. I mean what are you going to do, threaten D? She wants that anyway. Then what after D? She'll have OM around S as much as she wants anyway.

[kenva]

S and I were watching a movie together. At one point from what he saw that a couple was together, he turns to me and sais,"you never say that to mom". I said what? "I love you". "Because your always fighting". I melted and teared up. For one we never fought in front if him. He just got that impression because we don't talk to ea other at home. Her choice. I then hugged him. Held him tight and told him that I love him very much and that I love mommy too. He smiled for a second and said, "then why don't you say it?" I then changed the subject. WOW!!
What is a person to say to that?

[kenva]

Yep !! Happy Thanksgiving !! Just got an email from my attorney to review w's attorneys email to me on moving forward to set a trial date. Wow!! Nice timing. She even served me on Good Friday , right when I was getting ready to go to church w s. Ticked her off cause I dismissed that.