Don't know what to think

[T-boned]

Thanks, Job.

Yes, I have plans for the holiday - having my 92yr old mom and my oldest sister (70) over for dinner. If they were fun to be around I'd probably be welcoming spending time with my side of the family, but they are not. My upbringing and family life has pretty much been one of duty, not one where there was much demonstration of love and affection. And lots of judging - how thin you are, do you have wrinkles, what clothes are you wearing. Every time I see them I get the once over. I've learned to ignore it - my H used to call them on it all the time.

Anyway, I plan to have them over, but will try to get them home early and go visit some friends. Hard there too in that these are friends H and I spent a lot of time with. But I'll be glad to see them.

I'll be ok. As you said, I'll feel the pain, let it out and hopefully in a few hours it will pass.

Thanks for the support. I know you have great insight by reading other posts where you've given support.

Thank you again...