The danger is that sometimes when women communicate this, they do it in a way that makes us feel defensive.
I really liked your post, but I just want to pick up on this.
I accept that the way that women communicate can cause you to feel defensive, but that is your response. The woman didn't make you respond in this way.
Women need to take responsibility for how they express things, but can you see that there is a subtle shift of blame here, probably unintentional?