I'm sorry life is so difficult right now. It can get better.

LTH asked and I didn't see an answer, have you gone to AlAnon? It seems that even tho you admit that his drinking is a problem for you, you're ignoring the elephant in the room. The A is not the problem, his drinking is, and of course whatever issues underlie that. But those are his problems,

Your job is to focus on you. AlAnon will help you get there, if you want to get there. You have to want it.

There's a slogan in the program, Don't go to the hardware store for bread. It seems nonsensical until you think about it and know where it comes from-don't go to an alcoholic for love and affection. You're trying to create normalcy out of a totally abnormal and chaotic situation.

I know his words and behavior are painful but it's not all you. He just wants you to think it is so he can continue to be King Baby.

There's lots of help just waiting for you.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss