I completely agree with Acc! Your W is not going to stop hurting you right now. She only cares about herself. You need to protect yourself. It look me a few months to realize it. I kept hoping that my H would realize the damage that he was doing to me and to our children. H cannot do that right now because he is living in a fog. You have to look out for YOU!!
Even though I long to be close to H, long to be friends, I cant allow it to happen when the OW is in the picture. I have thrown myself into protection/rebuilding mode. While things feel awkward with H and I am still sad at times, I feel empowered. I have taken back some control over my life. I have gotten to a point that I can see that while the kids and I may be missing out, it truly is H's loss.
I know that it is scary because it feels like you are letting go. But I bet you will find that you feel more in control of your life than you have in a while.
