Angela, good work on pulling those insights out of yourself.
I think now that you have had that "AHA!" moment it will be easier for you to be deliberate in making good decisions. When we see WHAT we want and how our actions could be undermining that I think it becomes a lot better to make the changes in our behavior stick. It becomes less about "right now I am feeling anxious or misunderstood and I want to text him" and more "I want him to have the chance to wonder about me and why I am pulling away and what that means for him so I am not going to text all the time."
me-35 WAS-37 T-16 1/2 Son-14 (HF Aspergers) BD,ILYBINILWY,"I met my soulmate": Oct5,2013 "Letting go because I love him, holding on because I love him."