Hanging on to the roller coaster

[CallaghanClown]

Having had a great day, I'm in a bit of a slump right now. No expectations is so hard but I'm early on in my journey, so it's to be expected that expectations creep in.

H has just left and I feel......weird. He was relatively 'normal', which I always find so hard. Paranoid still but not in a depressive slump or manic or rambling. Well he did ramble but not incoherently.

He says he was up from 2:30am and his head was racing. I didn't ask why, I wanted to but I didn't do it. He needs to sort through his issues himself.

I found it really hard when he was talking about all these new friends he has. I've known him 18 years and I've never heard of these people. Plus talking about one of these friends children that calls him uncle and cuddles him. It was like a knife to the heart. Says she's like D6.....I bit my lip hard on that one.

Again ignoring everything he says.....

He sat very close to me to show me some pictures of an event he was running.

He got the kids to tidy their room.

He tidied his mess.....after being asked.

He stayed to chat for 45 mins after putting the kids to bed. All about him but I'm happy he feels comfortable chatting.