"You're My Best Friend"

[uRworthy]

I just actually expected some response in that I was waiting to be asked to the birthday party and didnt go to the concert instead. The truth is, I really did want to be invited to the birthday party...altho I don't really know why. I don't really have anything in common with any of H's friends!

I think you could have either asked him if you were invited or made the other plans, right? I mean, you dont have to go to everything with him. Especially if you dont really want to go. You have a right to do what you want too.

My way is avoidance.

Yea, thats a bandaid to get you through, but, the cut is still festering underneath.

I've brought it up with our C and she said to focus on positive memories of any kind from my past.

Hmmm, might be time to talk to someone else because that doesnt seem like it will get to the cut either. You have to get to the root of it, in order to get it to heal.

I've been trying but feel in such a slump. I feel my self-confidence has taken such a beating. I felt much, much stronger last year when ready to go through a D! Now, it's much more difficult.

You felt stronger because you were in control, you took your power back. Now you are totally letting him lead. Take some control back.

And my three boys (H, and S20 and S14) all like to have me stay in the role of homemaker.

Um, not really their decision. They are old enough to deal with you living your life, Rh, and old enough to fend for themselves for the most part.

So....back to your response...I'm not really sure who I am or want to be.

Maybe I should start there?

YES!!!!
f

Instead of a "to do" list ... a "to be" list?
Who I want to be and what my dreams are?

I feel I have more in life I want to do than that!

Rh, it is ok to put yourself first sometimes. I know you are worried about your marriage and your h. But, it is ok to take care of you. It is ok for you to find out what makes you happy, what fills you up.

He still needs to work through things. Leave him to it. You do you.

So, start your list, my friend.