3) Your SD just got a D. I don't know if it was because of infidelity, but either way, she was betrayed by her father and then her H and then by you. She's been betrayed by three men, so she won't be playing cheerleader in your corner and is probably telling your W that you can never be trusted.
Transparency alone isn't going to work in your case. People who cheat have shown to have hidden phones and email addresses, so showing that to your W now won't do any good.
The reason why I asked if there were a reason why your W would want to stay with you is to see if you could point out any good traits or actions that your W had responded positively to and possibly could again. If you can't think of any, then it's harder for us to find a starting point for you.
My suggestion would be to start with your SD. Have you apologized to her? Tell her that you're sorry for how badly you've hurt her and betrayed her trust. Tell her you love her and while you don't deserve her forgiveness, that you ask for it any way. Start off small with a comment here and there and then increase interactions.
Next, if there was something you were responsible for in your marriage that required trust, such as finances, continue to show that you can be trusted in those areas. Ask your W questions and keep her updated. Don't go overboard with the interactions but keep them business like. Then slowly turn them friendly.
You have to show your trustworthiness through actions and time.
This is excellent advice, and the SD angle is very insightful ^^^.
