WORKING TOWARD CONNECTING WORKING ON ME

[Ambivalent]

This is a copy of a question asked of me, and my reply...

Quote:
Perhaps, but I get the feeling that there are issues she never overcame which were there even when we first met. Were there any hints at the beginning of your relationship of difficulties of any kind that could be problematic later?


Yes, but it revolved around how I perceived I was being treated.
In the beginning he stood me up!

Then his friends and family were more important.

His family didn't want me to come to the Thanksgiving they always had in Norfolk


Rehearsal dinner he was an hour late!
His mother didn't show up.

The day of our wedding he played his first round of golf.

The night of our wedding, his friend planned a party and he didn't tell me 'til after our reception, on the way .

He made time for regular basketball, regular golf, but NEVER regular date night
Golf was his obsession for many years sometimes two rounds on a Saturday!

So the answer is Hell to the yes!

I didn't know it hurt me, for I just detached. But being more in touch with my feelings now, it pains me to put it in writing.


It KILLS libido. It kills desire and slowly builds resentment.

When I was single , I got hit on all the time. It was annoying because it was overtly sexual and I didn't like being perceived as " a piece of a-s " I wanted respect and men to see my brain as well.
His lack of time for me on a regular basis seemed as more of the same, as if I was just an aside to his life. I was not considered as part of his life.

Wow just got a dose of realization here.

MLC or not, he's always been about himself.
:C

This has made me realize, where I fit into his life and not how it became our life. We always lived parallel lives. OUCH!

This is not looking good. How did I hold on for so long? Why am I holding on to possibly be his back up plan...Oh God , I'm not liking what I'm thinking...