I honestly think you need to do much more work on you and not worry about the M right now.
I think you need to back far away from her right now, from what you have said, this will be very hard for you.
I don't think you have changed other than out of fear.
Take some time and look within yourself, I think there is a lot of anger and hurt in there...
I say this from experience.
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
