While I am still trying to continue on my journey, I am also still struggling with the news that it ia a PA.
Hang in there brother! I know it's tough (been through that phase myself), but you've been working on YOU, and you've made a lot of progress there, and this news doesn't change anything about that.
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Should I have taken a better stand? Should I have done something differently?
No and no. You did what you needed to do to save yourself. Sometimes that in turn saves the M and sometimes it doesn't, but either way you win. You'll see that with time. You're just struggling TEMPORARILY with the emotions over this new news. Once the dust settles you'll be in a better place.