I had an "interesting" conversation with XW today before I left. Her brother - a good friend of mine - is having trouble with his new bride. She doesn't seem to give him general support and encouragement as one would expect a spouse to.
As XW was recounting the conversation she had with her brother, she was telling him about her own experience. She told him about how when something positive happened for her at work, that the first person she called was her XH (me) and that I was happy for her and encouraged her and supported her...and that *I* was her ex. It certainly wasn't unreasonable for him to expect that kind of support from his W.
And that I was the first person she called aside (something that probably needs to be addressed and something that I am figuring out the right way to remedy), in the back of my mind I'm wondering if this is registering with XW. That even some married people - some that are newly married - don't get the general love and encouragement that she gets from me. And I didn't even really do anything except be happy for her.
I'm not wasting any time wondering if a light bulb went off above her head, I just thought it was "interesting."
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
