Okay, so when the bomb is dropped, they consider themselves D. And maybe I can understand that he felt D or that the relationship was over while separated. How then does it give him a pass for everything that happened for the two years up until BD? I also give him limited leeway on the MLC insanity too. Mental as he may be and way, he was very high functioning. He has known right from wrong all along. He knows he was married. He kn.......
How many times has job and the vets said that by the time we get BD, they are already halfway or more into their crisis?? So that covers 2-4 years before BD. MLC 101.
Raine, I am not picking on you, but since I see from your posts that H is just about there there, I also see some things that as a guy, bother me and can see them causing issues in reconciliation and R down the road. I understand you have a bunch of buried feelings, hurt, anger that have been on hold for a long time. I do understand that.
But I see some controlling that raise alarms. I see a bunch of conditionality. I see a bunch of mindreading.
Just being honest. Because you deserve it. You are worth it.
I am not saying these are right or wrong, just take a deeper look at things, that's all. You don't have to agree or change one darn neuron of opinion.
I think you are used to things going the way you want them to, you are used to making things happen in accordance with what you want. You are a successful business woman, successful Mom, and just from your writing I can see a driven, results-oriented person. That is good, attractive stuff. But it can also be a problem sometimes. I think you also said that H was pretty passive in the R previously, so you are used to driving the bus. I feel that in your latest posts.
Just stuff that, as a guy, you might want to take a second look at.
You are so close. I'd hate to see expectations at this point sabotage the progress and process.
You're still awesome, though!
When's Wonka getting over here, lol? Love to see the input from someone who knows the other side...
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
