Me 13 months on, affair finally confirmed.

[hotwheelsaust]

Apologies in advance for my rant, but I am so upset, annoyed and a bit angry today. So I need to put words down.
I cannot get over the fact I and my sons have been lied to for over 1 year. I cannot get over that my wife has been having an affair with this other woman. It peeves me off to think back to way before BD signs were there that they were an item. The texts and phone calls all the family questioned about, 1 month prior to BD while we were on holidays back with the family. The ring being taken off at BD. The "I would feel uncomfortable" when asked if she wanted to do anything for our anniversary one month after BD. The "I don't want you to see me without clothes on anymore" the first day of BD. The bathroom being locked all the time. The being blamed by the wife and family for all this, when it was the wife's affair that was the doing. The thinking that maybe I wasn't as bad as I or everyone thought I was.
The lies she said about the flowers at Valentines. They were from a parent thanking her for her help, yeah right. The being blamed by all the family for my faults that lead to my wife leaving, when it was her choice and affair that made her leave.
The frustration that once the family find out, they will probably just continue on without worrying about what the wife has done to the family. The mother when she found out, simply said, "when are you both (wife and OW) moving back down here".
The anger that my wife for all our married life was so annoyed with her real dad having an affair while married to her mother, that she will not talk with him again. But now she is the one doing exactly the same thing.
The anger that the family told me to stop talking to my adult sons about the situation, and they in turn will probably tell my sons that their mum is a lesbian and in a lovely relationship and all is ok.
The annoyance that I want to call my wife and rant and rave about all of this, but I won't, because I know better. The want to ring up all the family members and say "I told you so", but I won't, because I am better than that. The want to ring up my ex best friend and say "thanks for the support, not", but I won't, I am better than that.
The knowing that I cannot say or do anything about this knowledge of her affair is so hard to handle at times. I want to tell the world, but I cannot.
Thank goodness I have learnt things over the last year, and therefore can come to the conclusion that I will get over this feeling. It is the downhill section of the rollercoaster, and I will survive.
In my mind at the moment, I am still married, will still wear my wedding ring. I will still not initiate anything to do with our separation. I want the wife to be held accountable for all that. I will be the better person.
Sorry again for my rant. Rant over.