Hi Julie, if you have a thread already started, you should just keep adding on to that thread. It's easier for people to respond and give you good advice when they can scroll back to catch up on your situation and what has already been said.
I'm not entirely clear on your H's complaint. When he says you are nagging and controlling, does he really mean because you ask him to make sure that S's homework is done or the kitchen is clean? (BTW, which S was the homework for? If it's for the older ones, the nagging should be directed at them. In fact, my 9 yo is responsible for her homework too - though it may be different for you, not sure what your S's special needs are.)
If cleaning the kitchen is fairly your H's responsibility, can you just let it go if he doesn't do it? I mean, say nothing and just let it be? Don't do it for him. See if he does it himself. If not, then maybe he will feel badly about it and do it next time.
I forget your sitch bc this is a new thread and your signature doesn't have much info about your R at the moment, so I'm not sure what the dynamic is in your M.
Anyway, if it is clear who is supposed to do what, I'd say just do your stuff and let H do his. Say nothing if he doesn't do it.
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
