[SemperFi00]

AS thanks for the comments. W hasn't directly stated ^^^^^ but I feel relatively certain that is why she wants the adoption to take place 1st. She and S8 are close - as most young children are with their mothers - and I would guess that she wants to make sure that she has partial custody of him.

labug, have thought a great deal about your questions above and here are some of the thoughts rattling around my head right now:

- It is the right thing to do to formally adopt my nephew. His birth parents are not fighting it and we are really the only family he knows at this point.
- From a legal perspective, if W ends up filing for D it adds one more child to "legally" provide for, complexity to proceedings, etc....
- From a "moral" perspective it changes little, we are already (and have been) providing for him with no support from birth parents
- My sense is that children are best developed by being in an intact loving family that provides lots of support. Historically W has agreed/said same things but in the current situation has changed her story on that a bit.
- At some point will S8 have questions/struggle with feelings and trying to understand why he had two families he was a part of that couldn't stay together, etc....
- I am not sure what to say to the guardian ad lietum when she does the family interview and home study
- How do we approach getting him baptized after the adoption in the context of our current situation

I am not so much angry that W wants to adopt who we have raised for 6 years, if anything I may be a bit angry (and hurt) about the overall situation and how selfish W is acting right now.

And her current unwillingness to do things that could result in some sort of reconciliation..... Just seems that currently she is acting and viewing things through a very selfish lens......


Wow - seems like writing this all out maybe has helped a bit....

I'll stop now for a few minutes to reflect and see what thoughts/comments/insight I get from everyone here.