I fully expect her to put on a mask for the holidays. This is what she has been doing around all her friends and such. She will put on the mask and try to exclude me from conversations so that it looks like I'm being the unfriendly a$$hole. This has basically been her MO over the last few months. She has just been erasing me from the family whenever she can.
Example 1: We carved pumpkins together as a family for Halloween and she took lots of pictures as we were doing it. Happy times. She posted the pics on FB and she had been very careful to take the pics from an angle that you couldn't see me at all. It was like I wasn't even there. I was literally sitting on the ground right beside my boys, cutting, ripping pumpkin guts out, etc. She had to go out of her way to make sure I didn't show up in those pics. I only know this because one of our mutual friends commented to me about our jack o lanterns that she had seen on FB.
Example 2: A couple of months ago, before I really began to detach, I was trying to make Wednesday night date night for us while the boys went to church. I took her out to one of our faves, a little Italian restaurant in town. While we were eating, she posted on FB that she was treating herself to supper because she had a great day. Yuck, disrespectful.
Needless to say, I stopped looking at her FB quite a while ago.
On another note, I have noticed that she is really trying to spend a lot of time and energy on her mother right now. This is the mother that left her at age 12 and has come back to sanity and reality over the last 10 years. She hasn't talked to or seen her dad in weeks. This is really odd. MIL is really cold with me right now as well. i won't speculate as to why, but the last time I saw her, I sat beside her at a ball game and she would hardly acknowledge my presence. FIL was the one that openly stated that I had been a lot friendlier and happier lately. He's also the one that stood and raised her and her brother after MIL skipped out on the family for several other men.
Wonder if there is a correlation? Looking for common ground? Sympathy? (She says she has told her mom about us)
Rejecting FIL because he sees me for what I am? (We have always gotten along very well and he knows nothing of this mess)
Holidays could be an interesting time of triggers for her. I'm just anticipating putting on my seat belt and crash helmet for when we are away from the crowd. I'm gonna enjoy myself and my family and friends. Lots of turkey and football coming!
Both 40 T-22 M-18 S13 S11
Bomb, ILYBINILWY-7/10/13 EA #1-confirmed 7/10/13, ongoing since 5/13 EA #2-9/13/13
