Hi Melissa I am in! I find the thoughts just jump and take over.I have been keeping this to myself but have opened up to a couple of people and it helps.. The dog just ate my socks so I am not sure if that is positive but he looked happy at least. You might think you are a novice but I find your thread inspiring. As well as dealing with H and the issues, managing an enormous house and garden alone ( he does nothing in the garden when he comes, it looks amess and he used to really enjoy making it look good- gee I don't understand that) I am also expected to be doing all these amazing projects at work... eek that is not going so well.
So I suspect that his boss has found out about his affair ( it is a work colleague) they have been keeping it secret.. SO now I wonder where that goes..if it becomes public will he embrace it and own it or reject it...I have no clue It is hard when you think you know someone so well.. isnt it and then.. smack there is a stranger there
The other problem is he has said nothing about any future plans. He said he is living for the day, it is no good to plan because you are always disappointed. I need to remind myself that he is probably also depressed ( and in denial about that) so is not thinking well..but the best information I have is he needs space, to care for himself and live for himself.. but that was before he said he was seeing someone else. since then nothing..but I also did not raise that topic ie future, relationship etc.. I amlistening to my coach as you said. but I am confused
So good things for this week started yoga it was good accepted for a running program to help me run 10ks.. maybe good could hurt I have some good friends I have started applying for new jobs ..whatever happens I can't and don't want to stay here.. the jobs are on his side of the country but I also have good , close friends there. Actually it feels good to take some action and not just wait for H to direct everything. A colleague told me what a great job I do... that was good. H answered text( twice) and actually telephoned..so I was able to keep it light and chat and be the one who said have to go !
I asked a friend to helpme fill in the weekends so I have a lunch date .. with dog in tow
I have lost 13kilos and am the thinnest i have been in 10 years - actually feeling good about it and getting compliments..and I have a new selection of clothes to choose from..
I could write a list of what makes me want to stay in bed with the pillow over my head.. but WE are not going to do that are we ????
thanks for your reply Melissa some how we will come out of this better and stronger and wiser.. Have a good day.. Guess this should have been a PM.. oh well what ever
though I would value opinions on what I might expect when the affair is exposed...or at least discussed with the boss.. any expereinces anyone ???
