I wish for you to have every bit of courage, strength, and grace as you face the next challenge as you go along your father's journey. I do get where you're right now as I recently lost my father to lung cancer last year. The shock will take time to process and please be real gentle with yourself, honey.
Thinking of you. Remembering losing my Mom to Esophogeal Cancer 8 years ago. Do whatever you can to spend some time with him. I'm grateful that I was able to do that - time I could never get back. I don't live with regret but I miss her every day.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
Thanks Wonka, Barb and Adinva. I talked to my Dad today. He is amazingly in very good spirits. He is meeting with the oncologist sometime tomorrow to see exactly what he is up against. Hoping to get released from the hospital by Wednesday. He told me that since both his parents died in their early sixties, he never expected to make it to 70 so he figures the last 6 years have been nothing but gravy. I'm making plans now to get down there in the next few weeks for a visit.
Sorry I'm so late here. My T1 went down on Thursday and I haven't had any internet or phone at work since then. It got fixed last night.
BA, sorry to hear about your dad. He sounds like he's in good spirits, so that's a good thing. PMA definitely has a good psychosomatic effect on the outcome. My former boss is a fine example.
He left the company to me back in May 2008 to manage his advanced liver disease (with cirrhosis). He then was diagnosed with esophageal cancer which was later determined to be liver cancer that had metastasized there. For the past 2 years, he's been managing the spots on his liver and now lungs with radiation.
They told him back in 2008 (which was his 65th birthday year) that his life expectancy was 3 years - at the most. I swear to God that he surprises all of us. He's determined to live every day to the fullest and has been a fabulous example of fighting the good fight.
I guess we all have to take a ride on this train, and the key to navigating it successfully is to cherish all the moments we have with those we love, not take our time with them for granted, and yet celebrate life (as long as we all have it).
Have a safe trip, and I know you will make the most of whatever time you have left with your dad.
Hugs to you-
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
The dr told my dad when he was trying to join the navy that his heart was too small. That is so funny because he has the biggest heart of anyone I know. I just call him"Grinch" (his heart was too sizes too small). Dad later found another dr who said "forget what that dr said - you will likely outlive he & I both"! Which he has. Funny thing, though, Dad had the same prognosis as a child of 5. His mom was told he would not live past his teens.
Thanks for the well wishes everyone. Got a minor update from my mother this afternoon. Dad is still in the hospital. He met with the oncologist and the cancer is back they just don't know how extensive it is. They are setting him up to do a full body scan later this week to determine that. He is continuing the dialysis treatments in the hospital and he has had some slight improvement in his creatin levels so that is at least some positive.
Other than that he is acting pretty normal as he is getting quite cranky with the nurses and my mother said he was pretty much an "unhappy camper".
As for the dating scene lately, not looking too good either. I haven't heard from Barbara since Friday. I sent her an email on Sunday and no reply. So obviously not the response I was hoping for.
I did meet up with Marianne on Sunday evening to watch the CAPs lose horribly to Betsey's Avalanche. We weren't much of a match for your team Bets. It was good to get out though and I was able to talk to Marianne about my Dad (she is an oncology nurse) so that was helpful.
I've received a couple of emails from new people on Match and I'm trying to decide if I want to reach out or not with everything going on. It may be a good thing to keep me engaged socially and not just withdraw from life completely due to my father's situation. Not 100% sure what the right thing to do at this point.
Good that you have Marianne's support - sounds like she has information that she will share with you to help YOU process. I'm a firm believer that knowledge is power - it's so much more effective to process and plan when you have the information you need to move forward. You sound like you have a good handle on things.
I'm sorry about Barbara too. Pay attention to your red flags going forward when she does respond. They're important.
As far as match.com goes - something tells me that you know what you need. BA, you're a pretty intuitive guy and you've done a pretty damn good job in reading situations well. Whatever you do decide to do, I know you know what's best for you. And you can always decide to switch tactics midstream if you do decide to do something else. Right? Nothing here is etched in stone.
You know I root for the Caps when they're not playing my Avs. Heck, I followed the Caps in their most dismal era (the 70s). So while it's not hard for my loyalties, I still don't enjoy the win as much. Color me an idiot. But truth be told, I really love my Avs and this is the most fun I've had watching hockey in a long time. I'm considering getting season tix again next year. Of course, then I have the stress of finding people to go with me when I do that - which was a problem when I had them. So I might have to just take it in the 4 packs or something. At any rate, I guess it's time for me to head home so I can catch the game against Carolina. Sorry for the disappointment Sunday, BA.
I'm going to do a shout out regarding the game at TG to see who is in. I might have to task you in getting them and write you a check. My D19 and her roomie now want to go, so if you want to make this a family group thing with you too, that is fine by me. Then I'll ask my cousin if his kids are interested - he has a S19 and a D16 too - S19 goes to JMU and D16 is a junior at O'Connell. Then there's Merrick.
Let me know what you think? I could also abandon ship and my girls and head to a sports bar with you and Merrick too. He's in Arlington. That might be easier and more fun too.
Hang in there, bud. You're one of the most enlightened guys I know so I have faith in you. The only way out is through, and you seem like the kind of guy who just gets this.
Hugs-
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
