I'm too wordy, too, Angela. I heard your "it seems to be working" as something for you. A way to cope by listening more and talking less, thus allowing more healthy interactions -- it didn't come across to me as a ploy.
But I liked the reminder from uRw not to use changes as a way to get our spouse back.
Me54/H47 '08 H is "done" March '12 H moved out Brink of D, December '12 2014 totally reconciled! ...... "I firmly believe in the...absolute possibility of marriage renewal." Jim Conway