He's the confused one...

[BRNR]

BF - Thank you for taking the time to read my update.

Honestly, it doesn't feel like anything to know it didn't work out with OW. I mean, in some ways, yes, I want to laugh, and in others, I'm a little sad. I almost wished it had, at least all the destruction would have been worth it. So those feelings at this time negate each other too much to feel anything.

And now I have some new fears surfacing...because of the chosen few that know the sitch, they have all said the same thing, he will probably want to come home now that he realized he f'd up. And honestly, I don't want that. I don't even want the attempt made as I feel that it would be an even bigger slap in the face than the actual cheating and would cause more destruction to me physically and emotionally. It is my time to explore life on my own. And honestly I don't feel any love for him anymore. I don't know him. I don't hate him, but the longings in the beginning of having him return to us, its all gone. Honestly, that is why I don't post anymore too much.

And yes, he has reconnected with his mother first, and now the kids. This is good. I hope it last for their sakes.