Rise & Shine - Need Support

[Pudmuddle]

Hi 3, my H is currently doing the same thing, although he still lives at home. As far as I know he is still seeing AW and continues to enjoy the pleasures of home. Although I have noticed on the phone bill that he does not have many texts or calls going out to her. We never have R talks and he will not see a counselor right now. So we are much in limbo right now and probably for awhile is my guess.
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The positive things I see about what has happened in your sitch lately is that he is willing to see your IC and that he is participating in R talks. He is also showing signs of understanding what it would mean if he were to lose these comforts that you are giving him.

imho, I would say in your sitch that you should lay out some boundaries. But I know that is hard, very hard. I think talking to your coach first is an excellent idea, to get an objective opinion and straighten out your thinking.

My H too, wants to be 'friends' during all this and if we were to D. Since I told him: I don't think I could be friends with him if he were to file because friends don't treat each other like this. And if you were to D me, you would be leaving me not only as my H but as my best friend, he has been very kind to me now. And he has not moved out as I suggested. Since then we have talked about nothing R related and he has shown more interest and sensitivity towards his son.

So all in all, I hope you get to lay down this boundary and feel good about it afterwards. That is key that you feel like you have to do because you want to, not just because others want you to. And that it will give you some peace at night to know that you have stood up for what you need.

I'll be watching 3! I know you are having rough moments, but you still sound so good and positive to me. Keep that spirit up.