We keep moving forward. We keep dancing at least 2-3X per week, between lessons and social dancing. We spend time with another couple where a budding friendship is forming. I've been a member of a church for two years, which has helped me in dealing with marital and life stressors better, and helps me to see that my past marital problems are a part of life, and that all of us have a past filled with mistakes. I have less shame surrounding my marital past, though I do regret mistakes I've made. My W talks about joining me for church, but I go regularly to make my own connections and continue developing a mindset that makes me a better husband and human being. My W is meeting with a career counselor and attends a job support group so that she can find enjoyable, stimulating work that she is fairly compensated for.
I'm not tha same person I was when I got married, and during our trying times. I can see how I contributed to the problems in the M. I'm glad we didn't get a D. The area I need to continue to improve on is connection and intimacy with my W and others, personally and as a couple. Relational skill gaps are what got me into marital trouble. I'm good at autonomy and developing other skills. In a discussion group at church, we were asked how do we need to grow in the coming year. I answered that I need to continue to be less conceptual and intellectual, with more time invested in relationships.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
