In my non-expert opinion, lol, now that your H has moved and you're giving space through no calling/texting etc.. unless necessary. But when your H contacts you or if you're invited to spend time with him as you were last night, find natural opportunities in those moments to "speak his love language". Like if he's in the kitchen and you have to walk past him in a tight space; touch his back gently (if touch is his LL) or if you all sit on the sofa don't sit all the way at the other end and be awkward, "act as if" and sit nearer him [but still giving a comfortable personal space of course] , or if he looks nice when you see him let him know or if he does something helpful tell him you appreciated it(if Words of Affirmation is his LL).etc...
So in the times you see him or he calls you, you're "acting as if" your happy to see/talk to him; yet you've set him "free". You have a PMA and every once in a while when you're around he feels a special touch or hears something you've said that makes him feel special/appreciated/smart/etc.... Then when you leave he has his space again..... it's hopefully in those times of space where he thinks back those positive visits or phone conversations and says maybe she wasn't so bad
OK, this makes a lot of sense. I think I am just greedy and missing the many opportunities I had when he was still here to 180 and speak his LL. I think I just have to see the extra space as a positive and not a negative - yes, he will likely reflect on our interactions during that time, and I really need to make sure that our interactions are positive so that he is thinking of those and not of the person he decided was causing all of his misery.
That is tough that you don't get to see your H as much . . . but I guess it's just a different ballgame, having to DB/LL long distance.
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
