The Red Pill aka The Leap of Faith

[JFun51]

Sorry Tsquared, maybe reading too much into my "concerned" statement. I literally asked her if she felt OK, just like I would do a coworker who looks like they are having a sh!tty day or are feeling sick. When she said OK and shrugged, I let it go and left her to it, going into the other room. Last night was very refreshing after the previous night in which I worried a bit about how to set my boundary about the texting in bed.

Thanks for the reference card. After a couple of statements over the last few days, I realize that one thing I must avoid is trying to act parental towards this lost child that my W has become. She definitely doesn't want or need that. Its very hard when someone you love is hurting, but I've gotta find the ability to just let her walk it.

I think my activities of going dim and GALing are really helping me and are sinking in with her a bit. I continue to remove myself from her actions and find my own way in life. I know you guys think I am not ready to jump off the cliff, but I can tell you I am in a very different place than I was 2 months ago. My outlook on this situation, myself, and my children is very different.

I have been rereading all of Cadet's homework and other people's threads. My greatest goal right now is to identify those areas that I've got to fix first in me so that I can move on from this. I am having a great struggle with reconciling detachment and abandonment. I'm getting better. I will reread the info on being "lovingly distant."

Trying to be better today than I was yesterday...