I would worry a little (a lot!) less about "how to behave," and a whole lot more about retaining an attorney. I see that Theoden's excellent advice to you above was not only not followed, but you didn't even respond to him.
Is there a family remember you can borrow the legal funds from? A 401(k) you can tap? Something you can sell? Take out a cash-out re-fi on the house? ANYTHING??
I'm afraid your wife is about to take you to the cleaners in her current state, and with the voices she is listening to in her friends. Please do what you can to protect yourself!!!
