Don't know what to think

[T-boned]

Talked with a friend tonight (she actually performed our marriage ceremony and knows my H very well)and she was expressing concern that H is hurting me and disrespecting me by not getting the divorce proceedings started. She thinks I should talk to him and tell him to either ___ or get off the pot since he's the one who wants this.

It is a little puzzling why he hasn't made the move yet. I think one of four things is behind this: 1. He doesn't want to start this over the holidays 2. He's waiting until he feels settled 3. He's hoping I will start it so he doesn't have to 4. He's not sure about it

I told my friend that while it is painful at times (I had a bad morning), he is giving me the gift of time to work on myself and that no matter which way it goes I will be fine. Besides I am not going to do his dirty work for him. I still love him, darn it, but if he wants a D, he'll have to start it.

I'm not totally conviniced this is really what he wants. I don't think he even knows what he wants. I could be totally off base, but such is the situation. I'm just staying quiet (dim/dark?), giving him time and space. Time will tell.