She's gonna make it.....

[RosaLinda]

I'm glad you've noticed your Hs being called to the mother ship too, Pud and Heather. I think Cadet is probably right, that the "spacing out" is probably due to depression. My H is horribly depressed; depression is the underlying cause of all MLC, right? 

Bea, I've also wondered if H would love me better if I could whip up a bit of RT's nasty aggressiveness and bossiness, but like you, don't care to become a bully. Plus I asked H if he wanted me to act more like RT and demand he get his lazy ass off the couch and get a job. His answer was that he's not an easy person to live with, and my easy going nature is the only reason we've been able to stay together for 38 years. I guess that means no, but it doesn't stop him from being infatuated with RT's odious pushiness. 

"Isn't that part of the fermented oatmeal recipe?"

thanks FY, you always make me laugh! It must be that humor class you took!!  Bright, thanks for dropping by! I'm sure you're right and RT WAS referring to H's surgery tomorrow, but WHY? Why is she so anxious for H to have surgery? His ability to have S-E-X was my first inclination. But SweetRed is probably correct, and "things might not be as important or exciting as I'm making them out to be." uR is always saying that the relationship between our spouse and the OP is nothing like we think it is. So maybe this is NOT some secret sexual code like I was assuming. Just some Russian foolishness or other. 

H has been practicing his dance moves for the distancer-pursuer dance contest these past 2 days, but I'm not playing. Yesterday afternoon H acted as if I did not exist, as if he was looking right thru me, so I went into my room to read and eat pretzels and did not say one word to him all night. Today...joking, teasing, lots of eye contact. He even asked me if I wanted anything from the store, and picked up a bag of steamers, my favorite food in the world. 

Maybe he's nervous about tomorrow. Good thing RT won't be with him. She doesn't believe in medication and would probably insist H undergo hernia surgery with only a couple of dollops of fermented oatmeal and some vodka.