trying to understand the why's and how's of their thought process will drive you crazy. its best not to try too hard.
detachment takes effort, when the thoughts creep into your head you have to push them out, replace them with healthy thoughts, which is why GALing is so important.
what you think about becomes habit, if you spend all your time thinking about something, then later your mind will go back to these thoughts without your control. you'll catch yourself thinking about it and not knowing how you got there.
and yes, it gets better. and yes, getting better takes effort on your part. but you're worth it, and the kids need you to be your best.
"In a ham and eggs breakfast, the hen is involved, but the pig is committed".
