When H and I went out of town last month, we did the 5LLs test, talked about what that meant for each of us and made a plan that we would do something fun (QT) together once a month. We would alternate who did the planning, in the past it's 90% been me. I've got Dec covered, Nov would have been his month(yes, I know it's not over yet)but there has been no talk of a plan and I'm starting to feel "same ole, same ole"
To his credit, other things have changed, he's done a lot of work here at the house of his own volition. He brought me a load of firewood yesterday. I am more than grateful for these things. He's an acts of service guy.
But going out and doing fun things is important to me. Having someone plan that with me in mind is like gold...and it doesn't have to cost a lot of money. He could put the canoe on the truck, pack peanut butter sandwiches, come and honk the horn in front of the house and I would be ecstatic!
How do I bring this up again, without being a nag but still making my needs heard?
Or is it "Patience, Grasshopper, patience"?
Labug, I will put this out here.
I have been quizzing my W over the last few months about what she likes and how she likes this or that, what is important to her, what is not. I want to do things that she wants and that make her happy, so I am taking the time to learn.
That said, I still run into fear, anxiety, feeling of pressure to do things for or with my W. My W has done nothing to pressure me, yet I still feel it. I think I feel pressure in my own mind that I create out of fear. It is something I am working on.
So as Rick said maybe your H feels pressure, not from you, but from himself.
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
