New to the board, fairly newly LBS from MLC.

[RosaLinda]

I laughed when I read "Must be nice to be the OW, you don't have to cook or clean or parent, you have time and energy for ridiculous past times like "controlling his personal hygiene decisions." Good grief."

My H's OW, the notorious Russian Tramp, has appointed herself my H's medical advisor. And sadly, she has instructed him to ignore his doctor's advice to continue his lyme disease antibiotics in favor of eating fermented oatmeal, some kind of Russian folk remedy. He is also prohibited from eating many of his favorite foods, like pizza, coffee and beer. Tea and vodka are okay, sigh....

"When WS comes home, I'll probably be here loving from a distance, waiting for him to initiate contact... but with luck, maybe I won't be and then he can really be alone with his thoughts and feelings for awhile." Yes, that's right. Give him lots of time and space, but be approachable when he does approach you. Don't beat yourself up iver the "cake eating" - lots of LBS continue to connect by ML. It's up to you. 

What did you end up doing on his birthday? An awful lot of us seem to be married to scorpios, not the easiest people to live with even without MLC.