I did keep them. She texted me a little, and I reminded her of what she said this afternoon. Which was, "I'll call u tonite when it's done". She responded by saying, "Well, if you don't care, then I don't know why I'm trying." She said OM got interrupted by a work call.
I don't believe it. I think she chickened out. But luckily, I have a boundary in place, so instead of getting all butt-hurt or going on and on about W, I just think, "Oh, well, the burden at this point, is on her."
And then I enjoyed a glass of beer, and some funny movie trailers.
So your marriage was otherwise great b4 she left you and had an affair? Seems like your focus on her leaves an important part of the equation out. I'm sorry you didn't have a deeper response to my question, I was actually hoping to see specifics.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
@adinva - of course it wasn't great - W spent 16-18 hours a day in bed, and I was a jerk. I just don't know if I have the mental or emotional capacity to answer at this point; partially because I need to spend more time working on me, and partially because I'm not a therapist.
I'm angry right now because W proved she is a liar, with her heartfelt promises about ending things tonight, and I stood up for her and believe in her, and I just don't want to think about her at the moment.
Jon, she didn't prove anything, u don't know what happened. How many times here have you said you were going to do one thing but did another?
And now you move into the victim position again.
This won't require responding to anyone, over the next couple of days read over your threads here with a critical eye, as if someone else had written them.
I would like to see yo make a success of this, no matter what your W does.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
@labug - I promise I won't move into victim, I just believed SO much in W. I really thought this was it, and it's hard for me to swallow being made a fool. But I am. So I'm going to be mad about it tonight, get over it tomorrow morning, and move on.
I'm angry right now because W proved she is a liar, with her heartfelt promises about ending things tonight, and I stood up for her and believe in her, and I just don't want to think about her at the moment.
Good grief Jon, you are all over the place. This morning you were all-in with making it work with this wonderful woman, talking about the great sex and such, and now a few hours later she's a liar and a cheat. CALM THE F DOWN!! You are soooooo impatient! OM has been filling a hole in her life that YOU put there. It ain't gonna be easy for her to break it off with him. Read the piecing threads, she will probably go back and forth many times. You can honorably and lovingly maintain your boundaries with her or you can kick and stomp and pout like a little kid. One attitude will bring her back, the other will push her away.
@AS - there you are! Don't worry, I'm not backsliding. I really am not bent out of shape, I knew there would be false starts, and I know that W is terrified of anything that requires her to commit her heart.
I really don't need a 2x4, I was just being a whiner for a minute.
"I just didn't want you to think I was blowing you off. I WILL take care of this. I love you."
~~~~ pretty sure many of us would DIE to read that !!
Enjoy what you got buddy! There is a major POSITIVE
She just needs more time!
Maybe respond tomorrow with: I realize this is hard for you too.
just my .02
Good luck,
Magic!!
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
You've established your boundary, now be quiet about it (to her) and enforce it. Engaging her in her "I knew you wouldn't believe me" talk won't lead to anything productive for you two.
What's your boundary on talking/texting/communication?
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
