Laney,

You didn't actually negate the suggestions made to you...you simply gave EXCUSES for not doing them.

so h "needs" his vb to keep him happy and proud, I'll buy that (I guess ) but you want a h and family to keep you happy and proud and that somehow comes second to h's happiness?

ok, ok, let's ASSume that h's work isn't enough for him, his son isn't enough for him, his m isn't enough for him and vb gives him the extra ego boost. That's fine and dandy, infact it's healthy.

What is unhealthy is you not being happy, you feeling like you can't have a hobby of your own, your own time etc because it will conflict with h's vb/happiness.

I say tfb for h, Laney has every right to happiness too and if h doesn't find it important to a. give her that time, b. participate in something with her..well then phoey to him.

The fact that you do most of the family stuff with son alone is sadly somewhat the norm (thought I would hope that most dads are absent due to work and not their pleasure but we can't get pissy with h because of it instead pitty him for all that he's missing in seeking out this ego boost elswhere) Take advantage and plan weekly events with son that make you and him happy, invite h on occassion but make the best of things for son and yourself.

re a hobby for yourself...doesn't have to be sports, though there are many that you could be good at if given a chance...why not try bowling or darts (they both have leages as well and are co-ed to boot perhaps h might get a clue that way and if not well you might just find something you enjoy that helps you do understand his infatuation with vb competitions)

I know I ramble and talk all over the place...can't help my spider web brain...

re. cheering h on...well maybe you can't go to the games (huh? your h is playing there and they wont let you in? w'sup with dat?) son is old enough now to throw a ball around right? why not set up a mini vb net in the yard or somewhere in the house with a nerf (soft spoungey) vb and teach him to play like daddy? let h over hear you saying "maybe one day you will be as good as daddy at vb"

I still think it all sucks but that doesn't mean it's not workable.

LL