Intro - hoping for support/advice on DBing

[melissag]

Thanks, NQ. OK, I took some deep breaths. I think I might go read some threads on the piecing board, just to remind me that this isn't necessarily the end of the world. And, that I have to keep it together through this really rough time - I can't let my emotions decide how to handle this in front of H. He claims right now that he wants to spend a lot of time together as a family, so I will still have opportunities to connect with him and continue 180ing. I think it is mainly fear of the unknown right now. He certainly hasn't committed to working on our M by any stretch of the imagination, but he has said that he wants me in his life and that he is not closed off to the possibility of fixing this. (I know, I know, don't believe any of what he says.) I feel like when he is here, I can 180 and GAL and all that great stuff . . . I can see that it is making a difference - a big difference in only about a month. But I am petrified that when he leaves, he will just forget about me, or we won't end up seeing each other very much, or he will love his new fancy apartment and life. Gak.

I guess that is me trying to control him again . . . gotta stop that. Just need to get through the next few days without appearing too pathetic or angry. Once he is out, I can focus on myself and GAL, and 180 when I am around him. OK, I got this . . . . wish me luck.

NQ, I have a class for most of the day, but will need to come home at some point. I just hope I can hold it together for myself and my kids.