Do I tell her how I feel 1 year on?

[Fartiltre]

LJC,

I've noticed 'things' very small things but to a LBS the slightest thing is huge

You are so right – and especially to the LBH (in common). Read up on me, T1000, HWA, dingo or others and you will see a common line that we tend to analyze everything apart.

Right now you overall feel positive responses from your W and she has even asked some questions. Focus on this over all perspective right now! If you really feel this right now it is properly how it is. It can change since this is not a linear process so enjoy and celebrate this movement for now.

You are doing just fine with the GAL and fatherhood – keep on doing exactly that.

I'd still like to tell my W how I feel and friends have said tell her as I've nothing to lose, if I don't get the right response move on at least i've tried but then do I really want to risk backsliding and getting her to confirm to herself she has done the right thing?

I haven’t changed my opinion don’t do this! DON’T!
I think you are hoping for her to just jump into your arms and start kissing you and if I am right you will be most likely be disappointed and perhaps even ruin some of the good interactions you have right now. Thereby it is also my opinion that you have a lot to lose!

Your friends are well meaning and caring people but the advice they give is (and I am guessing) not given out of knowledge or experience but on the ground of caring about you. They properly tell you what they expect you want to hear – just to make you feel better in the moment.
The urge you feel about telling your W is, as I read you, based upon emotions. Keep those in here and do not act upon them in front of W.
Think this through objectively and decide what YOU think is best for you and for your chances of R.

I know this is rough times, I can read your hurt in your lines and I am sorry that you are going through this.


The positive side is that you have small positive interactions with W right now – focus on these.
Instead of sending a letter then you might consider accepting one of her invitation and then show her a good time along with the kids.
Be the man she would fall in love with!
You fear OM! What do you fear he looks like? How is he acting, talking, walking and so on?
Could that be you?

All the best!

F

P.S I am not a VET - so wait for AS or others to come by!