Thanks for the positive post NQ I was half joking about the "could've" thing I said on the phone call and you're right it stopped him going off on one I have asked for a counsellor who specialises in CBT, so I'll be looking forward to what she has to say I didn't mean any offence when I said about those who don't go to church you know. I was trying to be polite I was going to say Christians, but then that might offend someone as well, lol. Anyway, I'm pleased that you believe in letting go and letting God as well I'm off for my dinner now, back on later and will answer your thread later
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
I know you didn't mean any offence - and if you need reassurance none was taken. And I didn't mean any with my response either.
That's actually one really big difference between H and me. H's favourite saying when anyone discusses religion is that he's a satanist (he says it stops the conversation pretty quickly) and he always, not jokingly, said he'd burn if he set foot on church ground. We got married in the registry office, and not because we practically eloped (only 8 people including us, the registrar and her assistant at the ceremony) but because H wouldn't do the church thing. We lived in a cathedral city and my son asked one day (he was around 3 at the time) if we could see inside the "big church" - H flatly refused to go in with us - talk about setting an example for a little kid.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
MY BIL is like that, he's an atheist. He refused to marry in a Church as well, but they still had a big do! The kids have also not been baptised, so I missed out on being a godparent Ironically though they've sent my nephew to a Church school as it was the best in the area. I once sent my nephew a wooden Noah's Ark for Christmas, without thinking! My sister said they had to make up a story, I thought that was so wrong! Especially as my sister comes from a Christian background. My sister does take her two kids to Church when they go up to visit my mum and when mum goes down to visit them.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Most of the non-Catholic churches in my part of the city do Christmas Eve carol services - the Catholic ones just do midnight masses. My sisters and I used to love going to them with my mum when she was still alive. I am thinking about taking my son to one this year if he wants to go - he did ask a few years ago but out of deference to H we didn't go. I'm going to wait until closer to the day before bringing it up to him.
The stupid thing with H is that he's not an atheist - he was raised CofE. He's just not interested in going to church and thinks his responses are funny - twisted sense of humour that he has. He's a Mason and they are required to have a "belief in a higher being" and swear on a bible when invested. So he either lied to them or he really does believe.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
Most of the non-Catholic churches in my part of the city do Christmas Eve carol services - the Catholic ones just do midnight masses. My sisters and I used to love going to them with my mum when she was still alive. I am thinking about taking my son to one this year if he wants to go - he did ask a few years ago but out of deference to H we didn't go. I'm going to wait until closer to the day before bringing it up to him.
Well that'll be a good 180 for you
Originally Posted By: Not Quitting
The stupid thing with H is that he's not an atheist - he was raised CofE. He's just not interested in going to church and thinks his responses are funny - twisted sense of humour that he has. He's a Mason and they are required to have a "belief in a higher being" and swear on a bible when invested. So he either lied to them or he really does believe.
You can bet that at this moment in time he's not going to Church. When asked what would Jesus do? He wouldn't be able to answer that one, lol. I feel that most WAS/MLC have turned their backs on their faith. Changing the subject - We've just got the new season of BBT over here There's also a programme that's new, starting next week with Steve Merchant. It's called "hello ladies" and is set in LA. Unfortunately I don't get the channel it's on over here as it's a satellite channel and I'm on cable.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Still only 4 basic channels or do you get 5? The area I lived in only got 4 channels unless you had satellite.
I haven't heard of the show, but I'll look it up later. I reduced my cable package to the basic so it'll depend which channel it's on whether I can watch it or not.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
"I feel that most WAS/MLC have turned their backs on their faith."
Okay, you changed the subject a little quick on this TTD. Two quick thoughts, one, it makes me wonder how they can turn their backs on their faith like that. Then you have the one's who still have faith and attend church but somehow are able to twist things to their own ways of thinking. Which we all know (as people of faith) there is simply some things in the Bible that are not subject to one's own interpetation such as marriage.
Could the LBS be such a bad person the WAS is willing to forfeit their faith? Or is the storm and fog so heavy and thick they have lost their way?
Sorry about changing the subject too quickly 2old I felt I was getting a bit deep and wanted to liven up this thread again My H lost his faith before he wanted out. He was up against some nasty rumour mongers in the Church and he said "if that's how Christians behave then I don't want to know!" Maybe that was the start of his MLC and foggy brain I don't know. I'm going to continue this conversation on FB 2old, as there's some on DB who have different views on religion (is that a better way of putting it NQ Nq, We've now got 5 terrestrial channels, channel 5 being the latest one. We've also got digital TV which gives you a few more free channels. I also have the basic cable package, that's all I need Apart from this new programme, I can get all the ones I want to watch
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
I always wondered the same thing about how they give up on their faith or whether it changed to suit their outcome. My W was and is (I presume) a long term Christian. She has a good friend who is also the same. Like a lot of subjects within our sitch's, this one has always puzzled me: that is the giving up on the marriage, especially without any working on it (in the WAS opinion). I have seen none or very few of the Christian values that she followed for so many years. Along with those values I wonder what other things she would quite happily give up to feel she is so right. Thanks also TTD180 for your writing about leaving it in God's hand.
ME:51 W:46 M:25 S:22, S:20 Divorced 16/9/15 BD 10/12 W left 12/12 with OW, affair confirmed Nov/12. Dark since 6/13 I"m in a new relationship since Feb 14.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
I was half joking about the "could've" thing I said on the phone call and you're right it stopped him going off on one 
Ironically though they've sent my nephew to a Church school as it was the best in the area.