DARK - how do you do it right? I need help BADLY

[DTM]

What I wrote is absolutely true - I never stopped loving or appreciating my W, I simply didn't understand her love language and her non-action methods of showing me what she needed. I certainly am not perfect nor do I claim to be but I will tell you that I am learning everyday to be a better husband and father. I have read the 5LL of children and now and working on the 5LL for couples. There is a lot of information there that I wish I understood years ago. It also sheds a lot of light on my childhood and how even though I vowed not to be like my father, I am. So yes, I am changing me for the better of me. Would I like my W to fall back in love with me, you bet. Is it difficult to live with someone you love who says they don't love you anymore...absolutely. Is it hard to not talk about R or your changes or your feelings...indeed it is. I am on day three of no R talk, giving plenty of space and zero pressure. No talk of D, S, or anything else. I am focusing on my children as much as possible and making sure they know they are loved dearly by both me and my W.
I am not dependent on my W, I WANT to be with her because I choose to love her. I value & respect her in every aspect of our marriage. I do love her more today than the day I married her because I undertand her as a woman more than I did 14 years ago....my only wish is that I learned it sooner.