"Am I hurt? Yes but nothing really surprises me anymore with those two. XW can deny it until kingdom comes but it isn't what it seems. She had an EA but denies it when I told her so I moved out."
First of all, unless you're the LBS, you're not going to fully understand what an EA is. She doesn't see it as an "affair". There was no point in you demanding her to acknowledge it.
"Nothing can compel her to rethink her actions."
That's not true. Sure she makes her own decisions, but hers (like everyone elses') are based on the current stimulus she's receiving. She likes the "buzz" she gets from the OM so that's what compelling her to not get back with you.
"Once someone is so comfortable with what one have right now, why would anyone give that up?"
When they see another situation that is equally, if not, more comfortable. That's what happened between you and her.
"I immediately gave up a friendship with a girl because she made GF (XW) uncomfortable. I told XW that. She replied that I did it when we were happy, she did it because she was unhappy."
And she was honest.
"You see? Nothing will convince her otherwise. She is dead set on this relationship and she will not change her mind once she have let go of her guilt. I know her."
So? Your issue isn't the OM, it's your relationship with your W. Even if the OM wasn't there, she wouldn't go running back to you. Just keep concentrating on your kids.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
