Well divorce busting says not to, but I would go with your heart on this. I've sent my H emails that I thought he'd be interested in and turns out he wasn't! Personally I would press delete on this email Gotta go as my dinner is ready
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
So dark dark it is I just wonder should I forward her the email to her?
If you want to stay dark but you feel she needs it, then just forward it on without comment.
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Yes, going dark n/c was and is for me but I will admit I have been hoping she would show something, anything.
I don't think I make it a secret that I personally feel that going dark doesn't help bring people back together. Sometimes the LBS needs it to fully detach and gather themselves, but it never seems to help the M any. I think the WAS often interprets going dark as the LBS being cold/ indifferent or even angry at them. I am 100% behind detaching, but detachment is just removing yourself from the roller coaster, it is not cutting all communications like some people think. MWD used the phrase "lovingly detach" in one of her books, I really wish she always coupled those two words together because I feel it gives a more accurate picture of the DB'ing approach.
Anyway, you've been dark for quite a while and if you feel it is not improving your sitch then perhaps it's time to call it a cheeseless tunnel and try something different.
I agree AS If you think that she would appreciate the email then send it onto her, but make sure it's what she will genuinely need and not what YOU think she needs. I've found that going dark doesn't help the sitch either, unless it's called for like my H being an a***. I got to the stage where I wasn't ringing him up for anything, not even to tell him that he's got some post. I've found that was a big mistake and just annoyed my H instead of it achieving what I wanted it to achieve. I think it did make things worse between us. That's not to say that you should start being over the top about it, remember don't scare the squirrel
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Yes, I sent it to her with a "W, this came to me today" and she did respond with a "thanks". The cheeseless tunnel is still on that is for sure. Damned if I do and damned if I dont it doesn't matter, she is still in iceberg mode. Oh well, this cheeseless tunnel looks looooong, completely cheeseless with a thick cloud of fog from one end to wherever the other end is....
It's good that she responded If I was you I'd forget that she said she wanted a D and just act "as if" Sounds like you've got a busy life now so it'll be easier to put her at the back of your mind
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
At least she responded If I've sent H something that I thought he'd like to know about, I don't get any response at all!
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
So I officially started my new job today. Very employee friendly corp. Took me by surprise I guess. I have been self employed for so long I really forgot what company employ was....I will be working the 3 to eleven shift which I'm not so happy about but hey, its a descent paying job for now while I continue seeking out a position in Property Management which is what I love the best.
Next week marks 7 months since BD and W leaving. I can honestly say I feel better today But, there still is some scarring and pain. Since I have begun n/c now 2 months ago W seems to have the same philosophy. Have heard nothing from her and I guess it is for the best. What Iam surprised about is that there has been no D filed by her for the past 2 months. I did expect that however, there may be several reasons why she hasn't of yet. I read many other sitches saying the same thing that papers they were told to be expecting just never made it. Very strange considering in many cases it's just not that difficult to get done.
What Iam surprised about is that there has been no D filed by her for the past 2 months. I did expect that however, there may be several reasons why she hasn't of yet. I read many other sitches saying the same thing that papers they were told to be expecting just never made it. Very strange considering in many cases it's just not that difficult to get done.
I just don't know why many of you guys out there b***hin about this. In my sitch, we got on the D process way ahead of schedule. She told it will after my overseas trip but instead found myself meeting with our L weeks earlier. The court hearing came way too early. Boy, she does wants to get out of this M. Pronto.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
