Ten years ago, he used a prostitute at the most trying time in our marriage. Oldest daughter was plummeting and desperately needed help, husband was downsized and we needed to sell home of 15 years. I was exhausted, and trying to support my husband's decision to try and start up a business. I was trying to be the sexy wife. Come to find out he was using a whore! He lied about it for TEN YEARS.
Ok, so he has a history of looking for stress relief in skanky women. He is, apparently, someone who can't handle stress well--job stress, midlife transition stress, financial stress. He is troubled.
But, people are more than one thing. I'm sure he has good qualities, otherwise you wouldn't love him.
My dad had multiple affairs. We live in a relatively small town and my family has been here for more than a century. One time I met a woman who knew my dad. She said, "Oh, but don't worry, I wasn't one of his conquests." Ewwwwwww.
But, sadly, while my dad was known for his affairs for a long time, he isn't a bad guy. Narcisstic perhaps. Not able to deal with messy situations very well. But, he is also fun, smart, charming, successful, etc...
He is more than one thing. This isn't black and white. There's a lot of grey here.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
