I quoted AJM above, because I'd like to talk about the concept of responsibility he raised. I've read on the board that MLCer's are hurting, depressed, acting out, etc. But I am not convinced that W didn't ask for this. She is not merely an innocent bystander unable to control herself. Plenty of people have handled mid-life crises without having affairs, and leaving their children, their homes, and their spouses.
I can't accept the premise that my wife is simply blameless in this. I am justifiably furious about what she has done. I don't believe MLC is a disease or a medical psychosis. I beleive it is a snowballing series of really awful decisions which reflect poorly on her character.
IF you have zero belief in MLC, then I encourage you to read the archives, and seek out people who have gone through this process.
AmyC Mirage Jasmine MrCAS (in newcomers)
I know there are others, they just slip my mind right now...... Cadet ??
MLC isn't as diagnosable as many other mental health diagnosis, mainly because no two MLC's are the same. They are as unique as the person going through them.
Each as individual as the next.
Does that excuse her behavior ???
Not in the least....
Are YOU the judge, jury, and executioner ???
Only you know that answer...
So...what are you planning on doing with your new information ???
Confront her, her family, friends, co-workers, the Pope ???
Bury it inside of yourself , and pretend that it isn't happening, so that it can eat you up inside ???
There are other options, yet until you can stop spinning, and treat this emotional decision in a rational way, you aren't going to see it....
Slow down and listen with your head and heart reconciled....
