its a fine line Ambiv.... I typically would behave from the "neediness" position, I am working on the "needing".

To explain from my sitch:

I am very scared to reject and turn off my h... I am moving into a new place soon and this is exactly my new concern.

So, my new goal will be to allow h to do "some" stuff for me to allow him to feel good about "helping" ... empowered. BUT, I won't be calling & asking at every whim. Will display my new independence as well. ........ fine line!

Hope this explains it a little for you.

Magic

M:46 H:49 T:20yrs
myD:22
H distant summer/12
H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12
BD: Dec 2/12
asked me begin to move end of Jan/13
moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff)
"agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)