Where am I at?

[Icecoldw]

Hi all, new here. Just found this site over the weekend andI've read a lot of useful information. The w dropped the bond Labor Day weekend, our wedding anniversary was sept 6, 8 yrs. since then I probably have done every thing your not suppose to do.

Brief replay, back in June w gets new job, she's been a stay at home mom. Her son joined the marines and will go in after his senior year. Her xh is getting remarried to a doc. W doesn't think he deserves her.

She works with a lot of guys, shuttles trailers around. Aug she went on second shift, that's when I noticed the changes. Going to the gym, lost weight,talking about her new friends, and doesn't want to talk to me. She acts like she's a teenager, shes 180 of what she use to be. I get jealous and accuse her of an affair. I get insecure, needy and clingy. That's when I start to snoop, nothing really shows up other the an adult dating sight, for hook ups. I confront her and she said its because she tried to down load ring tones on her new phone. Her phone is android and I was looking at her iPad. I also you that in order to get the spam she was getting you have to try and sign up, I know because I tried and got the same spam emails. Her phone and iPad are now password protected.

Sept she drops the bomb. I'm devastated because this is my second marriage and it is ending exactly like my first. I start to read about mlc and it fits. I started going to the gym, stopped drinking and dipping. Our relationship goes down hill rapidly, probably because I was pushing, wanting to work on relationship all that good stuff.

Beginning in October, i logged on to her FBI and intercepted a message with a past old flame, he was trying to set up a booty call with her, she said she couldn't do two guys at the same time, meaning her boy friend and him. She said when her boyfriend was done with her she would let him know. That's when I blew up and started texting, told her she can move in with bf so he could support her. She denied every thing and changed her fb loggin while we were texting. I was packing her clothes in suitcases while texting, if it weren't for our 8 yr old son the suitcases would of been on the front lawn. I then settled down and after a week, unpacked her bags. Same time I got a self help book and my eyes were opened up to who I am and why I act like I do, I know what I need to work on. Oct 5, last heart to heart talk with her, of course it was one sided, mine. Since then, I went dark, I work first she works second m-f. I don't call or text, the weekend we hardly talk. Since then, she has been acting some what like her old self, actually cooking dinner for us on some nights. She quit being a wife in August, has not cooked, cleaned the house, laundry or dishes.

My question is, is she going to her next phase or is she still in replay. Sometimes I think she has om or same one from August, or is she trying to make me feel like that so I will respond like I did in August so she can justify her leaving.

Thanks and sorry if my post is had to read, that's how my brain has been working