I think so many of us are so ready to get on with our lives, and it's hard to understand why their are so many spouses that just don't get it (but in truth I do understand, because I know I didn't get it for a long time). I agree that God does have a plan for us, it's just really hard when he waits so long to let us in on it. Hang in there though, you've been doing so well, and your May C session will be here in no time!