Welcome! Your sitch reminds me a lot of mine. You will find a lot of support here, so keep posting!
This may not necessarily "comfort" you, but your sitch and your H both sound like a very typical, very textbook case. There are many here who have been through exactly what you've gone through and know what it feels like to be in your shoes.
The good news is that, since your H sounds like a textbook WAS, what he is saying now may not be what he is saying in a week, a month, or a year. The bad news is there are no guarantees.
You have a DB coach...that is great! Listen to him/her and do as they advise. The only advice I offer to you now is to keep working at this, even when you don't feel like it. Remember, you are not finished when you are defeated - you are finished when you quit.
Endure well! You can do this!
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
