I know exactly what you are trying to describe. I can see my M heading that direction, and I want so badly to believe I can bring it back before it gets to that point.
I have to believe that the resentment and distance and lack of passion will dissipate, and it's just our (the DBer's) way of distancing and putting up that emotional wall to protect our feelings. Just like love, passion has to be worked on. You have your work cut out for you. Yucky, I hope you get the key soon, so I can copy off of you and don't have to do the work. (kidding-patience, I know, patience... )
) 
