Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 10 11
#2398166 10/27/13 08:50 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
My previous thread reached over 100 posts, so I'm continuing with this thread.

My Story: Devastated (First Post), Devastated II (Second Post)

Where Things Are Now: Devastated II (Last Post)


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
Anything new? Been thinking about you...


“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out” ― Art Linkletter

M - 06/01
D - 05/14
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
Originally Posted By: MrCAS
Just a thought...

When she spoke to you about how you should complain more when people don't do their job... You might have asked her thoughts on how that might be accomplished.

You could have validated her opinion and gained some insight into doing a better job? Nothing lost by just listening, right?

Never pass up a good opportunity to validate. Just thinking...


You are right, of course. I don't know if it is detaching or growing indifference, but I just wasn't responding as I have in the past on that day.


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
Friday was more of my new normal. W came by my office to talk about some work related gossip. We were both present at a meeting that afternoon. She didn't talk much, but she didn't avoid eye contact. I left work early and didn't hear any more from her.


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
For me, when in full blown detachment mode, it is hard to put validate on defcom five alert...


“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out” ― Art Linkletter

M - 06/01
D - 05/14
MrCAS #2398174 10/27/13 09:02 PM
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
Eye contact is a good thing, me thinks.


“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out” ― Art Linkletter

M - 06/01
D - 05/14
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
W contacted me Saturday. She told me she wasn't feeling well. She gossiped some about the meeting on Friday. I didn't respond right away, I was out GALing.

I attended a Mustang and classic Ford car show. Something I use to do with W, although she was never really interested. For me, it was quality time together. I almost didn't go, but I just jumped in the car without giving it a second thought. Can't say it was very social as I was by myself, but I did have some fun.

I did eventually reply to W. I told her I was sorry she wasn't feeling well. I told her to let me know if there was anything I could do for her. (My options are very limited, since she is in a gated apartment complex and has never invited me over.) I supported her decisions and actions at the meeting.


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
I waited to post any news for today. W had originally promised/threatened to pickup the rest of her things at the house. However, the weekend came and went and I did not see her. Of course, she was sick Saturday, so she may yet deliver on her promise.

I emailed her to ask if she was feeling better. She replied that she slept better than she had in a long time. She said she was looking forward to watching her favorite football team on TV today, like how I had fun at the car show. Since I never actually told her, she must have seen my FB post about it. I don't know how to interpret her words. I'm just so tired of being expected to mind read.


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
MrCAS #2398181 10/27/13 09:14 PM
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
D
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 237
Originally Posted By: MrCAS
Eye contact is a good thing, me thinks.


Eye contact is so much better than avoiding looking at me. I think I may be reaching a point where it is just not enough, though.


Me: 43 W: 44 T: 13 M: 8
BD: 01/26/2013
IC: 03/19/2013
S: 04/10/2013
TC: 08/14/2013
DF: 09/15/2013
DR: WAW LRT
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 853
Her making and keeping eye contact and not looking away is not enough? Baby steps, grasshopper, baby steps!

Eye contact is something you do when there is good things going on...


“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out” ― Art Linkletter

M - 06/01
D - 05/14
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 10 11

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5