Second MLC?? Is that possible?

[2Times2Many]

I've re-read the stages of MLC (for about the 100th time), and I think H is somewhere in the Depression/Withdrawal phase. He is definitely depressed, but I feel like he is beginning to survey the landscape and seeing all the damage that has been done.

He apologized to me repeatedly while he was here for hurting me and said he didn't want to hurt me anymore. He has thanked me over and over for talking to him and expressed how glad he is that we have the friendship back.

He doesn't think he can face the people who know about some or all of this, but he readily admits that it his own fault. He expressed regret for sharing with an employee (who talked to others) his R with OW. He said that it was an extremely hurtful and disrespectful thing to do to me.

He said he wanted to tell me about her when he was home last time, but just couldn't do it ... he said he knew I would be devastated. He believes that he wanted to "get caught" because he didn't try very hard to hide things. Maybe that was a test to see how I would react??

For years he has turned to me when he was in pain and I am glad that he feels like he can still come to me for comfort. It broke my heart to see the state he is in.

I am trying so hard not to be hopeful and not read into his actions things that aren't really there. You know, believe none of what he says, etc.???

I think it might be a good sign that he cancelled his appointments with the two attorneys. At least he isn't ready to go down that road.

I am trying very hard to keep my eye on me and remind myself that I really can move on without him if that is where life takes me. The head knows that ... it's the heart that is causing me problems.

Patience, patience, patience. Stay strong, girl!